You Know You're In Utah When. . .

Utah is a very interesting place. The longer I live here the more I realize this. It's kind of its own world in a way. A really quirky, interesting, somewhat messed up world. Yet I have no intention of leaving anytime soon. 

So with that said… you know you're in Utah when. . . 

there is a radio commercial urging you to "find your eternal companion" with a certain dating website

to the car next to you, your turn signal means you want to race

having 13 stick figures plastered to the back of your car is the norm

the only pro sports team you have is absolutely horrible and everybody still loves them anyways (cough Jazz cough cough) 

you use your heat seaters, heater, and AC all in one day

you pronounce 

Tooele as two-ill-uh

Hooper as huh-pur

Weber as wee-bur

Oquirrh as oh-kur

it snows during spring break

red and blue aren't just colors 

people wear shorts and flip flops as soon as it's over 40 degrees 

freshman guys in college are all 21 

the 24th of July is a bigger deal than the 4th 

you know what fry sauce is and what it's made of 

the "Holy War" is bigger than the super bowl

you know the difference between a "steak house" and a "stake house"

U and Y are not just letters 

your first child was conceived on your honey moon

schools stay open even with 2 feet of fresh snow

going on vacation means going anywhere outside of Salt Lake City

people get engaged after dating for less than 2 months 

you understand any of the things mentioned above 

In the Name of Baby

So I'm pretty sure everyone, their dog, and their pet rock are preggers these days. Everyone. I can name a ton of people who are preggo or have had a baby in the past 3 months. It's crazy. There must be something in the water, Utah and elsewhere. But let's be honest, there is always something in the water here in Utah. My sister is amongst those that are growing a mini human currently. 

Since she lives in California the gender reveal was a little tricky. And in this day of Pinterest, DIY, and all things expected to be a big shebang, simply saying boy or girl over the phone wasn't an option. So she ordered a cute little cake and I went and picked it up. We had to cut it open to find out if she would have her 2nd boy or her 3rd girl. 

And according to the frosting… IT'S A GIRL! 

My nephew Hunter wasn't super stoked I guess. Poor kid. 

All of her kids have a middle name that starts with "M" 

Both of her girls' first names start with "M" 

Basically it's semi been decided that she wants to do another "M" name for baby or potentially an "H" name to match Hunter. I think both would be cute. 

It was only like 2AM and I figured psh… who needs sleep. Because laying in bed for the 4 previous hours obviously wasn't enough for my brain to shut down and allow me some shut eye. So I started looking at girl "H" names… or at least according to this site they were girl names. 

So if you yourself are interested in choosing a name for your little girl that starts with "H" here's what I came up with. 

Huntah … because my sister definitely needs a Hunter and a Huntah. 

Or you could just back up the "fat Americans" stereotype and just go for this… 

Because it's every kid's dream to be named after a fried mashed up potato. Maybe in Idaho. 

There's also this option if you don't want your child to be able to spell their name until the day of their high school graduation. 

And babies are always heavenly aren't they? Well why not name your child Heavenly. But the spelling h-e-a-v-e-n-l-y is too typical so you should definitely choose one of the following. Also, hyphenated names are all the rage. 

And the Harry Potter generation has officially grown up, which means that Hermione is officially in the baby name books. But if you want to make it appear like the Harry Potter series had no effect on you choosing the name… there's 50 other ways to spell it, so don't fret. 

Sticking with the Harry Potter theme, you could go this route, and name her Hedvig and sound like a Russian trying to say "Hedwig" 

Then this gem. If you like a name, just throw an "H" in the front of it or replace the beginning letter with it. 

Such as Eloise Heloise

Or Tennesse Hennesse

If you fancy naming your child after brands or company names, I would pick one of these...

Or, if you like terms that are generally associated with the mouth/neck area these are for you… 

And for all those Jimmy Fallon fans you could go with good ol' Higgins… he's Jimmy's side kick and the guy who lost his pants 

Or if you live in Washington or Colorado your kid could just be High all the time! 

Then if you're big into the saying "return with honor" you could definitely return with Honor when you come home from the hospital, In-N-Out, Target, or where ever your choice of birthing location may be. 

Or if you want to prepare her for high school cruelty, you can just call her a Ho from the get go. 

I personally like Hoda…. it's kinda like Hoda Man!?!? 

The Blake Shelton route will also be sure to bring joy to your household. 

I mean Honeybee? How cute. 

Then we can't go through this without hitting up the movie and television names. 

Hercules. Because it's only fit for a girl. And then you can forever and always think "Hercules? Honey, I think you mean Hunkules!" 

I'm sure Hugh Laurie would love a little dedication to his drug addicted doctor role. 

Huckleberry Finn. 'Nough said. 

Then to finish it off… my favorite. From one of my all time favorite movies as a kid and possibly, maybe, as an adult. 

Hortencia. From Matilda. Remember this girl? 

She's the one who told Matilda about the chokey. 

She also cheered for Bruce when he had to eat the chocolate cake. 

Yeah, I'd definitely go with Hortencia. 

Now that I think about it, Matilda starts with "M"

Happy baby naming ya'll! 

The Bachelor: Final 3

The final 3. Am I the only one who is glad this season is almost over? This show drives me nuts anymore but yet I can't seem to quit watching. In short it's predictable, dramatic, polygamist dating. This season might be my last. Psh...who are we kidding. As long as Chris Harrison is alive I'm sucked in. Oh man my friends, I need to get me some Bachelor rehab. 

So the first date went to Lindsay. They take a ride on a wanna be golf cart with some dude driving the scooter a mere 10 inches away. Whoa! Ro man tic! They go to an outdoor market. Lindsay made the mistake of telling producers that she would try anything but eat bugs. So obviously Sean and the producers thought they'd be hilarious and throw this her way. As we learned earlier from Selma if you don't participate you basically have your name engraved on a shiny gold plate in front of that seat in the limo. She sucked it up and ate bugs. Then they headed to the beach where they got to feed monkeys. Not going to lie this may have been one of the cooler happenings on the more recent seasons of the Bachelor. 

EVERY TIME HE ASKED HIMSELF TODAY IF HE COULD SEE HIMSELF MARRYING LINDSAY THE ANSWER WAS YES. 

The next date went to AshLee. Oh, kill me now. This girl... she just... oh man.. heaven help her. They went to a private beach in which they had to swim through a cave to get to. Cue the metaphors. "It's like real life, I have to let go." "You have to trust" "You have to be vulnerable" yada yada yada. I'm pretty sure her vocabulary consists of: abandoned, trust, abandoned, vulnerable, abandoned, risk, abandoned.
 As you could all see the cave was SUPER scary. I mean with lights, flotation devices, and a guaranteed crew standing by, and other people in the cave. We're talking life threatening here people! She's obviously never been on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland. Anyways they finally find their way out and Sean feels like he should through a metaphor out there since he is on a date with AshLee. "We found the light at the end of the tunnel" And you can also see the end of your relationship with AshLee. Congrats bro. The beach was legit. I don't think there's anyone that wouldn't want to go there...oh wait... except AshLee. On to dinner. They talk about how they're both single and why. AshLee says she doesn't "take getting engaged lightly" WAIT! wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Isn't this the girl who got married at the ripe ol' age of 17!?!?!? 

OH AND EVERY TIME HE ASKED HIMSELF TODAY IF HE COULD SEE HIMSELF SPENDING HIS LIFE WITH ASHLEE THE ANSWER WAS YES. 

Last but not least was Catherine. They had an old boat to go exploring the island in and quite frankly it reminded me of the boat from The Princess Bride. Too bad we didn't have Inigo Montoya on that boat. That would have spiced stuff up! Sean sees Catherine as his best friend. Shocker. He said that about the other too as well. Later they jump off the boat and did you catch that Catherine did a flip!? That was freaken awesome! None of this holding hands while jumping crap. Then it started raining. It's always the worst weather on Catherine's dates. Maybe it's a bad omen of their future relationship. Her names for him honestly crack me up. Mega-hunk. Beefy-hunk. I find it entertaining. 

oh and you guessed it! 

EVERY TIME HE ASKED HIMSELF ABOUT CATHERINE BEING HIS WIFE HE COULD TOTALLY SEE IT. 

Onto the rose ceremony. If you didn't know who was going home by this point you must have been REALLY Bachelor drunk. Which let's face it, if you play the bachelor drinking game you're wasted within 10 minutes. 

Lindsay had the first video message. Sean's smile was huge. Obviously she's not going home. 

Next was Catherine. He still has a smile on his face. 

AshLee. What an emotional mess. She has so much baggage. If she were flying Delta she'd have to pay 1,000 dollars extra just to get it all on the plane. Did you see Sean's face? It was obvious she's the one hitting the road. 

Low and behold it was AshLee who got sent home. She was a beast when it came to leaving. If looks could kill, this Bachelor season would've ended early. 

I personally want him to pick Catherine. Yes, I am very aware the rest of the world wants him to pick Lindsay but in my eyes she's too immature. She showed up in a flippin wedding dress for Pete's sake. I haven't liked her since day one. I feel like Catherine is a little more mature and she seems the most real to me. AshLee and Lindsay both have severe cases of "the boyfriend voice" Lindsay talks like a baby most of the time and I just can't take that coming from a grown woman. Anywho... 

Tune in next week when Chris Harrison hosts the Jerry Springer show whoops I mean The Women Tell All.